Indulge me in a confession

fashion-1031469_1920I’m about to tell y’all something embarrassing.

A few weeks ago I was really excited for the Declare Conference and thinking about what I was going to wear and hearing about all the sweet deals at the Nordstrom anniversary sale. And I found out that Nordstrom card holders got early access and also I had no money. So, I felt like this was a winning combination.

I mean, there was a slight concern and a voice saying “don’t do it,” but I was able to stuff that down real quick with my dreams of an olive green utility jacket and Sperry duck boots. I want you to know that I literally do not have a coat other than the ski coat I bought at American Eagle in high school. My body has changed slightly since high school. So, it’s not like I don’t actually need to spend probably $500 and invest in some quality clothing. However. I do not need to go into debt over it. I’m pretty sure. This has been my philosophy my whole life and the borrower really is slave to the lender and I do think Dave Ramsey knows what he’s talking about so hence my guilt and shame.

This is the month where Spencer is switching jobs and we do not have steady income for a couple weeks. This is also the month when we have two birthdays, my tooth cracked ($875) and Spencer had to have new tires. So, like much worse timing than usual.

Anyhow, in a moment of weakness, I applied online for the credit card. And it said there was a problem with the system and not to try to reapply yet. So I waited like a day and did it again. I know. So scandalous. And also scandalous was the fact that I did not mention this idea to Spencer. Not because he would’ve argued or told me not to do it but mainly just because of the shame. I knew it was not a wise choice. But my lust for new fancy stuff overcame me. Which is weird because usually I’m able to be content about material things. Like not having a coat that closes or looks decent to wear in public. See? But the second time I applied, it flat out rejected me. Said I didn’t qualify.

I found this more than a little insulting because as I mentioned, I’ve never had a debt issue. I have always managed my payments well and have had a great credit score. So I was pretty put out with this situation and was waiting for my credit report to come in the mail expecting to see that someone had stolen my identity and I never knew it because I hadn’t applied for credit in years.

But when the mail came, after I got back from Declare and after the #Nsale was over, it said there had been an error and I did in fact qualify for the card. It advised me to reapply. But the temptation was gone by then.

Thank you, Lord, for protecting me from myself. Forgive me for giving into my fleshly desires instead of doing what I knew was right.  Please help me to be content with what I have which is so much more than what so many others have. Amen

Now, everyone save your money up and we will shop like never before next year.

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